Our unfortunate Christmas impalee is facing criminal charges for burglary and theft. (Scroll down to This Makes Me Cringe if the first link is bloggered.) Here are the steps she followed (this list has been updated):
1. Stay with friends or family for the holidays.
2. On Christmas Day, get drunk and high on methamphetamines.
3. Sneak into the empty house next door.
3. Steal a wicker basket, cordless drill and some seashells!!!
4. On the way back get impaled on your friend's/family's wrought iron fence.
5. Get rushed to the hospital with a section of the fence still inside you.
6. Tell police you were trying to return items from a garage sale this summer.
7. Go to the Ozarks to recuperate.
8. Get charged with two counts of burglary.
How sad. I hope she gets some counseling to go with her sentence.
Update: Her mom says she was simply trying to return some borrowed things. More source materiel, plus a picture is here.